Tuesday, July 17, 2007

crackbook

They say that if you don't post regularly you'll lose your readers. But what if you don't have anything to write about? While my body has been recuperating my brain appears to have shut down in sympathy. Maybe the whole package is just taking a much-needed vacation.

I haven't been doing nothing mind you. Just yesterday I painted my toenails silver and decided to test drive those whitestrip things you put on your teeth. (New post title: Boredom Breeds Vanity) I am also busily studying up on southern manners and protocol by reading Being Dead Is No Excuse: The Official Southern Ladies Guide to Hosting the Perfect Funeral. I have a recurring fascination with the American south, probably born when I was 11 years old and became friends with the new American girl at school. Her mother was from Arkansas, had a lovely southern drawl and her given name was Merry Melody. Really. (And it was spelled that way.) She perfectly matched the description in the book of the socially exacting fine Episcopal lady, minus the booze. ("The Episcopalian ideal of a gentleman is a man who, if a lady falls down drunk, will pick her up off the floor and freshen her drink.") Her always polite but often completely mystified reaction to life in a foreign land was an education to me, and I vowed to one day find out what life was really like along the Mississippi. (I still haven't made it.) When they moved back to Southern California a year or so later I went down to visit and we went camping at San Clemente Beach. It was the final death throes of the Watergate scandal and when the Nixons arrived at their beach house on their boat one day Mrs B was beside herself with carefully-controlled excitement: we got the whole story on Pat's outfit.





















See? Having nothing to write about creates seriously irrelevant digressions and helps me hide the Real Truth: I have nothing to write about because I got sucked into the black hole that is Facebook last week. Crackbook is addictive enough, but I also discovered a game application called Traveler IQ Challenge that I have now played 44 times! Though I'm doing pretty well on the other sections, after 12 games I'm still only getting an average score in the World Capital Challenge section.
What I really need to do is play just one more time. See ya.

25 Comments:

Blogger Belinda said...

HA! And now you know how to make a proper artery-clogging casserole, as well! (And don't you love how we Baptists are considered just a notch above barbarians in that book? I know I do!)

I do not understand facebook. I appear to be in it, but not of it. And I haven't played the traveler game, but have become immersed in various escape (Sphere, RGB) games.

17/7/07 10:12 PM  
Blogger carla said...

You crack me up, Andrea! Facebook...not for kids anymore... now that's scary. I hope you're feeling much better and will soon be up to doing something other than painting your toenails and whitening your teeth. We're on our way to artstream this morning to visit your fish... I will take pictures! xox :>

18/7/07 4:40 AM  
Blogger Merisi said...

They say that if you don't post regularly you'll lose your readers.

Depends on what you are after. :-)
Honestly, I do not manage to pass every day (yes, there are days when I pass more than once *g*), but the blogs I want so read, I do not drop, simply because that blogger has not any new posts on daily. There are only so many hours in a day ... :-)

(I have read only the first paragraph so far, only wanting to let you know that last night I finally managed to remember to photograph those plants in the Harrach courtyard. *g*)

18/7/07 5:16 AM  
Blogger kj said...

carla's on her way to see your fish?

oooooooh.

sometimes you just gotta go with the flow. toenails and teeth aren't so bad. neither is mindless.

happy summer, andrea.

18/7/07 5:34 AM  
Blogger Paula said...

Oh how I feel your pain. Only I very rarely have any readers so my guilt doesn't run quite as deep.

I don't do the game thing. I know I would be totally addicted so I just don't even get it started.

Summer doldrums.........the good news is everything changes.

P

18/7/07 6:31 AM  
Anonymous swampgrrl said...

oh my, andrea. you need an intervention!
i've never been over on crackbook. and your post scares the curiousity right outta me!

18/7/07 6:40 AM  
Blogger Cre8Tiva said...

you're always entertaining, even if you don't have nothin' to say...that's real southern speak...i'm fixin' to carry you to dinner is my favorite saying...the dixie doodler of old...blessings, rebecca

18/7/07 7:20 AM  
Blogger andrea said...

Belinda: You Baptists use LITTLE MARSHMALLOWS in your food! How barbaric is that? :) I think it's a Baptist trait across the board, though. My husband's ex-Mennonite and devotedly Baptist grandmother always made ambrosia salad for special events.

Carla: Yay! I promsie to go back to work today. As for Facebook being just for kids, I also got as excited as my kids (more actually, now that they're older) about going to see Harry Potter and Shrek the Third last weekend. Being a kid is nothing to do with your birth certificate. In my case anyway. :)

Merisi: Keep reading! You'll see that losing readers is not really a worry of mine. (You've been distracted by the literal more than once in my posts, though. Note: reading between the lines is usually a *lot* more useful.:) I often start my posts one way so I can segue into what I REALLY want to say. It's a cheap device, I know. I'm cheap.

KJ: Excellent. I excel at mindless when I put my mind to it.

Paula: I don't normally play games either for the same reason -- but was caught at a weak moment. I call that moment "weekends." Sometiems it's also "weekdays."

Swampgrrl: Run away! Run away!

Rebacca: You have to read the book. There actually are some good recipes (not just food with marshmallows) and the descriptions must be even funnier if you're from the south.

18/7/07 8:03 AM  
Blogger Angela Rockett said...

Well I can tell you that you will never lose this reader. Your blog is just too good, and by all evidence, I'm not the only one who thinks so. Your loyal readership is inspiring (and envy-inducing). It is necessary to take a break sometimes, and I'm glad you're taking care of yourself, silver toes and all! :)

I think you're right about the marshmallows being a Baptist thing. After living in Savannah for 3 years, and being part of my husband's Southern Baptist family for nearly 13 years, I can attest to that commonality. I have got to read that book.

As an Episcopalian myself, I nearly fell out of my chair laughing at the quote of the ideal Episcopalian gentleman.

18/7/07 8:32 AM  
Blogger andrea said...

Thanks, Angela. Would it be too obvious to call you an angel? (Again?) As someone whose early exposure to religion was Anglican and whose grandmother was a devoted Catholic lady, the Episcopalian dignity, breeding and boozin' are what I could best relate to, too.

18/7/07 8:43 AM  
Blogger Cynthia said...

Have you seen this blog/article mention? Viewing Race/Class division through facebook and Myspace
I know it's a little off topic, but it's an provocative discussion and comparison.

I just signed up for MySpace and though I've heard of Facebook, haven't looked into it. I felt pretty forward signing up for My Space - though I guess I'm just not all together with the "in" crowd! LOL

I've been in sort of the same boat as you - I'm doing something close to nothing at the moment and it takes every ounce of energy to visit my favorite blogs let alone paint my toenails.

18/7/07 9:32 AM  
Blogger Within Without said...

Andrea, this is one of the funniest posts you've ever written!

And while it WAS a so-called diversionary tactic, I wonder what Merry Melody is doing now?

And if she got married, did she take on her husband's last name, which hopefully wasn't Go Round?

I haven't tried the Facebook phenomenon either. But I'm glad you painted your toenails silver.

:-)

18/7/07 9:35 AM  
Blogger Merisi said...

Yeah, I know, "on the other hand" .... :-)
Have get back to my apricot jam.

18/7/07 1:09 PM  
Blogger andrea said...

Cynthia: I love statistical analyses/demographic studies. Took a brief look at this one so thanks. Fascinating.

WW: Har de har. Merry Melody was the mother of my friend so already married and firmly entrenched in her career of raising her daughter to become an important corporate lawyer. Which she did. And you haven't seen my teeth! Dazzling in all their crooked glory!

Merisi: Send me some. Apricot jam is my favourite bar none.

18/7/07 3:04 PM  
Blogger Ian Lidster said...

Whaddya mean you have nothing to write about? That was a great blog, my friend. I found it a treat from beginning to end.
Ian

18/7/07 3:08 PM  
Blogger andrea said...

Ian: I have read that true creativity is a by-product of boredom. If that's the case then this one *must* be a winner.

18/7/07 3:11 PM  
Blogger dinahmow said...

Woo-hoo! Silver toenails and a yen for South'rn manners.
I think your "diversionary dilemma" is what Vicki was on about when she wrote of procrastination.
It's good to see you back in the blogging saddle.

18/7/07 3:14 PM  
Blogger Alda said...

I'm resisting Facebook with all my might ... it keeps calling me and I keep resisting!!

It's the last thing I need: something else to waste my time on.

Oh, and I thought the whole point of blogs was to write about (mostly) nothing.

18/7/07 3:18 PM  
Blogger Ilva said...

First your comment on my blog and now I read this...now I want to know more about the Southern Lady!

18/7/07 9:47 PM  
Blogger Cream said...

This post reminds of Donkey in Shrek(Eddie Murphy )whimping: "I need a hug..."
So, Andrea, here is a hug along with the Apricot jam!

19/7/07 1:56 AM  
Blogger andrea said...

Dinah: Ya think? I call procrastination many things but it is what it is!

Alda: Resistance is futile...

Ilva: You'd love the book -- southern recipes of a wide variety (from the worst to the best) and hilarious commentary.

Cream: Thanks -- you read my mind! (I'm not sure I like what that says about me...)

19/7/07 7:31 AM  
Blogger Bibi said...

Very funny post Andrea. And with silver toe nails and sparkly teeth ... they should see you coming!

19/7/07 5:07 PM  
Blogger Tori said...

You need time for R&R. I glad that you are taking time for yourself and I love the Merry Melody story.

19/7/07 5:51 PM  
Blogger homo escapeons said...

Ha I joined facebook to connect with a group of young miscreants with my paternal grandfather's surname. We are as rare as unicorns in this hemisphere so what the hell...my wife is hooked reconnecting with people and my kids are all out there too.

It is like lazy blogging..I had some 'pregret' when I joined but what are ya gonna do?

19/7/07 10:02 PM  
Blogger andrea said...

Bibi: Attention-grabbers -- of course! :)

Tori: Thanks but it appears to have been soemwhat short-lived.

HE: Lazy blogging! That's *exactly* what it is!

20/7/07 7:35 AM  

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